Today I learned that I’m unable to forgive and forget. It sounds like a handicap, but it isn’t. Mindlessly forgiving and forgetting what everyone does to me would make me a pushover but refusing to do both is also a sign of weakness. Without closure, I would continue to dwell and begrudge others who have wronged me years ago and never truly be happy for the remainder of my life.
Anyone is capable of holding a grudge but that isn’t what makes us stronger or wiser. Great strength and wisdom can come from forgiveness, even if you can’t forget what they’ve done. By forgiving someone I’ve long held back from making peace with, I feel more at peace with myself and less irritable in general. Yes, the memory of those wrongdoings persists, but I feel that I am able to enjoy the company of who I forgave without letting the past get in the way. That is enough to ease my mind for years to come.
For the first time in years, I am content.